The one with Bill Kaulitz (AGAIN), the kidnapping of me and my best friend and MOAR creepiness

Wow, I have so many dreams involving Bill Kaulitz these days that I might as well give them their own category.

So for some reason my best friend and I had been kidnapped (I don't know by who) and taken to Moncton, but we were in a spot of the city that neither of us had seen before, but that's technically impossible because I've seen everything that there is to see in Moncton.

At that spot, it turns out that there was a Tokio Hotel concert, but it was completely free and no tickets were needed. We had arrived almost an hour before the concert, and there was hardly anyone there, so I'm guessing it was a private concert of some sort. Anyways, my best friend left me and went to a place that I still don't know the name of that was close to the place where the concert was, and I decided to stay with the band until the concert started.

For some reason, I decided it would be funny to go backstage and follow Bill wherever he went. For some reason he didn't seem to mind. And whenever he stopped somewhere I hugged him until he started moving again.

After that, my best friend arrived, the concert started, the concert ended, then my best friend and I left but not before I had sex with Bill just forget I ever wrote that, k?

After we left the place, I wanted to call a taxi to go back home, but we didn't have any money and a taxi driver would never want to drive for three hours just to get us back home. And when I took my cellphone out... IT WAS RUINED. The screen was blurry as fuck, it was all twisted, buttons were missing... I was all OH NOES D:

I woke up after that so I never found out how we got home.

The one with Bill Kaulitz and ice cream

This one is pretty weird. I had it a few days before leaving for Québec City. I can't remember much of it, but I do remember that my entire village was going on a vacation to the EXACT SAME SPOT (everyone was at the same place) and it turns out Tokio Hotel was there too, which is like OMG AWESOME.

I can't remember what happened after, but I remember that Bill (the singer of Tokio Hotel) ended up kissing me at the end of the dream (right before I woke up!).

Also, ice cream was involved somehow. LOL whut.

OH SHI-

This one is EPIC TRAUMA.

Remember the dream I had where I had sex with ten Nazis?

Try replacing the ten Nazis with Hitler.

...

Or don't.

WARNING: Failure to not listen to what the crazy blogger who actually really likes dreaming of having sex with Nazis and would love to do it for real just said will inevitably lead to epic traumatization and/or heart attacks and/or death. Neo Valkyyria cannot be held responsible for any accidents resulting from the fact that you actually listened to her.

The one with the deadly ants and the melting sofas

Erm, yeah, this one's weird.

So there was kind of like a rampage of deadly ants that were supposed to carry some really bad disease. They had attacked our house, and their nest was in our sofa, so we were dousing the sofa with water to drown them. Thing is, the sofa was MELTING because of the water!

Then it suddenly skipped to a bunch of people walking in the forest and being killed by TEH DEADLY ANTS.

LOL whut?

The one with the lost CDs

I had this one early last week.

So I had brought my CD collection in class for some reason, and every time I turned around, someone snatched either a CD or a CD booklet. I was able to gather up a few, but after a while the teachers started to help because they thought I complained too much. The people who stole CDs were all the people that I hate the most in my class.

Yeah.

The one with Halo "game preview" CDs, a baby Donald Duck, and a portal in my backyard

I had this one earlier this week. It was a bit fuzzy, so I don't remember everything.

So I was in a CD store. This store was made in a way that everyone was in the center and the racks were on the walls of the square-sized room. There was a small stall in the middle of the room where you went to pay your stuff.

So I found a, erm, "CD" that claimed to have "preview videos" of all three Halo games. I really don't get it either, but whatever. Anyways, I bought it for some reason that I still don't know, and I went back home to play it in our computer. As soon as it started to play (turns out the videos weren't Halo previews... heh heh), a portal opened in our backyard and a baby Donald Duck came out. I went out in the backyard to see what was happening, but I got sucked up in the portal too fast.

Who knows what that little duckling did while I was gone?

The weirdest one ever

This is officially the weirdest one ever. I had it at the beginning of the week, I think.

So I was in some sort of World War II-like death camp. Apparently I was supposed to die (oh noes!) soon. Right in the middle of nowhere, ten (!) Nazi soldiers come in and say they need to have a word with me. I follow them, we enter the office of one of the soldiers, group sex ensues.

OMGWTFBBQ.

The one with the Blaqk Audio, er, "sandwich" (?)

You're gonna think I'm a pervert because of this one. It dates back to September or October of last year, I think.

So I got in a dark room with nothing but a bed. In it, there was Jade Puget, guitarist of AFI and keyboard guy (what do you call those?) of Blaqk Audio. For some unknown reason, he was wearing a black kimono.

So I got it the bed and Jade and I started doing youknowwhat. (If you're a kid and don't know what the heck I'm talking about, don't ask your parents what the heck I'm talking about. You'll learn it when you'll be older. Then you'll understand what the heck a random stranger on the Internet was talking about when you read her dream blog as a kid.)

In, shall we say, the middle of the act, Davey, singer of both AFI and Blaqk Audio, entered the room and caught us. For some really dumb reason that I don't know, Jade invited Davey to join us.

So there I was, in the middle of a threesome with Blaqk Audio.

After barely a few minutes, my best friend entered the room as well and told me to get the hell out of there. (WTF?) I was sort of stuck in the middle, if you see what I mean, so I couldn't move. She then grabbed my arm and dragged me out of the room. She brought my clothes as well, of course.

But here's the weird part - all you Javey fans are gonna love this, I'm sure of it - : Davey and Jade continued to "do it", if I can say it like that, even after I was gone.

And so me and my best friend filmed the whole thing with a camcorder that had suddenly appeared out of nowhere. We then proceeded to not upload it somewhere where the whole world could see it. Like the Internet. Instead, we proceeded to upload it to a place where only my best friend and I could see it. Like an SD card placed under lock and key.

Looking back on it, I thought it was kind of normal, since I had that dream around the time when I first heard of Blaqk Audio.

Today, I would consider it more awesome if I was doing it with other, more awesome people. Like, say, Bill Kaulitz, Matthew Bellamy and Jared Leto. All three at once, yes. Like a foursome. But I'm not really sure how that would work out.

Oh, and I'd also appreciate it if my best friend would not catch us in the act and proceed to take Jared Leto away from me, which I'm sure she'd do anyway.

Or, instead of a foursome, I could do it with one at a time. But that wouldn't be as fun, right?

...

There's something wrong with me, I'm sure of it. Please act as if you had never read the past ten lines.

The one with the fake 30 Seconds to Mars, a mad scientist, weird people who sold me for ten million bucks and drinking vodka while watching the sunset

Whoa, I haven't updated in a while. Anyway, this dream is one that I had quite a while ago - can't remember when exactly. So, here I go.

It started while I was watching a 30 Seconds to Mars concert on TV. I was holding my deluxe-edition A Beautiful Lie CD in my hands, yelling at my parents that I "wanted to travel through the TV to get to the concert and get my CD signed" because the concert room was empty. I swear, there wasn't anyone there! So eventually, I was able to travel through the TV, only to find out that the band members were nothing more than holograms.

Meanwhile, my parents had sent a mad scientist to search for me because they had suddenly forgotten where I had gone. I managed to suddenly learn about this from a voice descended from the sky, so I went to hide from the scientist in some random strangers' house.

The mad scientist couldn't find me, so he offered to pay ten million dollars to anyone who brought me to him, so the people who were hiding me brought me to the scientist and pretty much sold me for ten million bucks. The scientist then said that he wanted to experiment with my DNA for exactly four years. He himself had no idea what he would do to me.

That same night, I ran away to go back home. But when I got home, my house was empty. Apparently it had been sold, my parents moved away and took my brother with them against his will, and now no one lived there. So, still standing on the sidewalk, I stared at the sunset in front of me (there's a big field in front of my house, and you get a perfect view of the sea from there), took out a bottle of vodka from my coat (if I remember well, it was Smirnoff green apple vodka) and started to drink vodka (which I don't do in real life) while watching the sunset. I quietly drank the whole bottle, then just walked away.

Who knows where I went?

The one with AFI and the mysterious morphing CDs that turned into CD players

I had this dream last night. Very weird, and also my second dream involving AFI.

So I was at another AFI concert. (Reminds you of the one with the broken CD*, huh?) Thing is, this one was held right here in my tiny French town of barely two thousand people. Weird, don't you think? Hold on, it gets worse.

I had my CD binder with me, but for some reason I had been able to cram seventeen CD boxes in it as well. And when the concert ended, I wanted to take the two AFI CDs I had and get them signed. But when I opened my binder...

IT WAS ALL FUCKED UP.

All my CDs (except for, coincidentally, the two AFI ones) were GONE. No more Muse, no more 30 Seconds to Mars, no more Dragonette, no more nothing. The CDs were all weird ones that I had never seen and did not remember buying. And when I took the two AFI CDs out, I kept getting mixed up, but I mixed them up with CDs that I do own in real life and that had suddenly reappeared in my CD binder: once I grabbed my H.I.M. CD by mistake, another time I grabbed the booklet for my The Rasmus CD instead of the one for December Underground, another time Sing the Sorrow ended up in the Dragonette CD box... stuff like that. It was sooooo embarrassing to be seen like that by one of my favorite bands. (Normally, I never ever get my CDs mixed up like that, and I certainly don't forget at what page they are or which booklet goes with it.)

When I finally got it right, the CDs magically transformed into CD players that looked EXACTLY like mine. How that happened I have no idea. Then, when the AFI members signed it, they signed with a bunch of random names that weren't even theirs. On one of the CD players, Hunter (the bassist) wrote FIRST CONCERT EVER!!!!. I still don't know if he meant that it was their first concert in my town or if he magically knew that that was the first concert I'd ever been to.

That was pretty stupid.

*For those who don't know what I was talking about when I mentionned the dream with the broken CD, I meant this one: http://onedreamonestar.blogspot.com/2008/02/one-with-broken-cd.html